SPFPP 246: Something Sex Positive for Sex Positive People
Every conversation, podcast, workshop, support group meeting, dating interaction, friendship, relationship, interview, media release, question, discussion, conference, therapy session, dollar raised and anything else that's happened since starting Something Positive for Positive People in 2017 has led us here.
So much of living with herpes is learning how to live with herpes. The reality is that many of us don't live, and then herpes becomes the excuse for why we don't have the life we want for ourselves. What Jamie Cawelti offers in this workshop through her work as the Executive Director of SexPositive World - public page is a community of folks who are learning out loud how to live a life that allows them to identify their needs and practice getting them met. The sex positive community has been far more useful to people navigating life than any herpes statistics/facts sheet/etc. has been to folks who struggle with living with herpes.
I hate that when people find a good thing that helps them through something they've been taught to be ashamed of, that they can't just say that it was useful to them. I want to get us past that, but we gotta be willing to get real uncomfortable in a way that we're unfamiliar with. Yes, dating sites for people with herpes and herpes support groups offer a breath of fresh air because we're not alone in it, but imagine better overall air quality consistently outside just those spaces alone. That's what the world of sex positivity is and I hope this podcast episode is a warm intro to what that is and means.
It's consent culture. It's getting to a place of knowing where your yes exists. It's knowing your "no" will be respected. It's where you can receive a rejection and understand how to take care of yourself in a healthy way. It's a self-reflection and discovery of pleasure outside exclusively being connected to sexual intercourse or another person. It's identifying healthy relationships and not moving forward with ones that are abusive or unethical. It's about setting boundaries. It's about seeking support when needing and having already curated your support system before you need it.
This space offers practicing self and relationship management skills that make for a better life overall. I believe people living with herpes will greatly benefit from looking into the space or the community. If you have questions after listening to this episode, reach out to Jamie or myself.
Jamie Cawelti is the Executive Director of Sex Positive World, and runs Given Consent! I asked Jamie to join us for a workshop for folks living with herpes as a way of introducing them to the self-reflective tools and support resources people struggle to find their way to, but are always thankful they found them. So much of the non-sex components of sex are presented in this community. We often go straight into looking for a partner or avoiding disclosures. What I present here is a much safer space where practicing saying no, disclosing, and learning what you want so you can ask for it is really beneficial. This space offers something I haven't found in support groups, and it isn't exclusive to people with herpes, it's a mixed back of what you may need to support your healing through community.
www.sexpositiveworld.org
www.givenconsent.com
@Givenconsent on socials
STARS Workbook: www.maketimeforthetalk.com