Welcome to the SPFPP Herpes Podcast
Something Positive for Positive People Podcast: Now Live Monthly!
The Something Positive for Positive People podcast is your go-to resource for navigating the stigma associated with STDs/STIs, including herpes, HIV, and HPV. We believe in the power of open conversations, real stories, and expert insights to build a supportive community for everyone affected by these conditions.
Starting in November, the podcast is going live! Join us on the last Tuesday of every month at 8pm Eastern Time for an interactive experience where you can engage with the stories, topics, and experts that matter most to you.
What You'll Find Here
Real Stories: Hear personal experiences from individuals who’ve navigated life with an STD. Their raw, authentic journeys offer valuable lessons and inspiration.
Expert Insights: Learn from healthcare professionals, therapists, and relationship experts who share actionable advice on managing your health, relationships, and mental well-being.
Supportive Community: Connect with others who understand your experiences. Whether listening live or catching the replay, you’ll feel seen, heard, and supported.
Key Topics Covered
Dating with Herpes: Practical tips for disclosing your status and building healthy, honest relationships.
Mental Health: Strategies to cope with the emotional challenges of an STD diagnosis.
Self-Care: Insights on nurturing your physical and emotional health.
Breaking the Stigma: Empowering conversations that challenge societal norms and encourage acceptance.us for the live show on the last Tuesday of every month at
Be part of the conversation that’s changing how we talk about STDs. Don’t miss your chance to connect, learn, and grow with the SPFPP community. Join our monthly newsletter and check the events page to learn how to attend live!
How to Use Our Search Bar
Looking for specific topics? Use our search bar to find episodes that cover the subjects most relevant to you. Simply type in keywords like "disclosure," "self-care," "mental health," or "relationship advice" to access episodes that offer the insights and support you need.
Join Our Community
Our podcast isn't just about listening—it's about connecting. Join our community of listeners who are navigating similar experiences. Share your stories, ask questions, and find the support you need.
If you would like to be a guest on the podcast to share your dating, relationship, and experience navigating stigma, please fill out the intake form below.
SPFPP 224: Discordant Dating Series - But Aren't Cold Sores Still Herpes?
In Episode 224 of the SPFPP Podcast, we close out the Discordant Dating series with Jesse, who shares his journey with oral herpes. Jesse's extensive dialogue with his doctor reveals the importance of education in destigmatizing herpes. We explore the challenges of disclosing oral herpes compared to genital herpes and discuss the broader discomfort people have around sexual health conversations. Jesse's story highlights how prevalent stigma remains, even among those who have experienced herpes outbreaks themselves. This episode underscores the need for ongoing education and allyship, emphasizing that cold sores are indeed herpes. Tune in to hear Jesse's insights and learn how we can create a more informed and supportive community.
SPFPP 223 Discordant Dating Series: Who's More Concerned About Transmission?
In Episode 223 of the SPFPP Podcast, part of the Discordant Dating series, we explore the perspective of Charles, who has dated a partner with herpes while testing negative himself. Many people fear being single forever after a herpes diagnosis, believing their only options are to be with someone who already has it or to remain alone. Charles challenges this notion, highlighting that relationships with someone who has herpes are not fundamentally different from those without. He emphasizes the importance of compatibility, communication, and understanding non-negotiables in relationships. This episode sheds light on the choices and thought processes involved in navigating a relationship where herpes is a factor, and the significance of trusting yourself and your partner. Tune in to gain valuable insights and break down the stigma surrounding herpes and relationships.
SPFPP 222: Discordant Dating Series - Knowledge is Bliss
In Episode 222 of the SPFPP Podcast, part of the Discordant Dating series, we explore the perspective of Paul, who is symptom-free and in a relationship with someone who has herpes. At 51 years old, Paul brings wisdom from his lived experiences, emphasizing the value of knowledge and emotional intelligence in navigating relationships. He shares how his understanding of herpes and prioritizing vulnerability over transmission risk helped him move forward after his partner disclosed her HSV status.
Paul's story underscores the need to challenge the phrase "ignorance is bliss" and highlights how informed conversations about herpes can lead to healthier connections. We discuss the importance of aligning values in relationships, touching on compatibilities such as intelligence, emotional awareness, and mutual interests. Paul's experience of meeting his partner during the pandemic also brings a refreshing perspective on finding authentic connections beyond online dating.
SPFPP 221: Discordant Dating Series - If You Want Different, You Gotta Do Different
In Episode 221 of the SPFPP Podcast, part of the Discordant Dating series, Anthony, a black man with experience dating multiple women who disclosed their positive herpes status, shares his insights. Anthony's perspective emphasizes the importance of maturity, education, and clarity in values when navigating relationships with HSV. He discusses how his partner's disclosure was intended to scare him off, but his unwavering understanding of what he wants in a partner helped him stand firm.
We delve into the importance of self-care and trust in relationships, exploring how these factors influence safety and decision-making. Anthony's story highlights the significance of being clear about your values and remaining integral to them, regardless of a partner's herpes status. This episode challenges listeners to consider if they are willing to do something different to achieve something they've never had before. It’s not just about herpes; it’s about being decisive and aligning with people who share your values and goals.
Tune in to hear Anthony's empowering perspective on dating, relationships, and the importance of staying true to yourself.
SPFPP 220: Discordant Dating Series - Stigma Ends Where Allyship Begins
In Episode 220 of the SPFPP Podcast, part of the Discordant Dating series, Laura shares her unique perspective on dating someone with herpes while remaining symptom-free herself. For over a year, Laura has been in a non-monogamous relationship, and she opens up about how her partner’s confidence and communication skills positively influenced her decision to move forward. She emphasizes the importance of compatibility over the potential limitations herpes might pose.
Laura’s experience highlights the critical role of allyship in ending stigma. She discusses advocating for her health with her doctor, using resources from Dr. Evelin Dacker to successfully request a herpes test. This episode serves as a valuable resource for discordant couples and those learning about herpes stigma. Laura's story encourages confidence in those disclosing their positive status and promotes receptivity and allyship for those receiving such disclosures.
Tune in to learn how informed communication and a focus on compatibility can break down stigma and foster supportive relationships, regardless of STI status.
SPFPP 219: When it Gets Real
In Episode 219 of the SPFPP Podcast, Jennifer and I delve into the intersections of identities as BIPOC individuals dating outside our race. We discuss our experiences with fetishization and the questions Jennifer, of Asian descent, frequently encounters about her dating history with different races. We explore the intention behind these questions, whether rooted in safety or fetishization.
Jennifer shares her approach to handling ignorance, deciding who is worth the emotional labor to educate. We also revisit the topic of herpes disclosure, particularly the challenges of communicating about outbreaks after an initial disclosure. Jennifer's story highlights the importance of creating allies by dissolving stigma within ourselves and expressing our beliefs and feelings about living with herpes.
This episode sheds light on the nuanced dynamics of interracial dating, the ongoing conversations required for herpes disclosures, and the power of allyship in our community. Tune in to gain insights into these important topics and learn how to navigate them with empathy and understanding.
SPFPP 218: Belonging Series - An Outcast Longing to Belong
In Episode 218 of the SPFPP Podcast, part of the Belonging Series, I delve into my journey of self-discovery as a Black, masculine-presenting, and Heterosexual-Queer person. This episode explores how intersecting identities challenge societal expectations and the process of unlearning systemic labels to find true belonging. Tune in to hear about my experiences with fetishization, dating outside my race, and finding community among outcasts who choose healing and authenticity.
SPFPP 217: Belonging Series - Performative Blackness
In Episode 217 of the SPFPP Podcast, part of the Belonging Series, Dr. Rob and I delve into performative Blackness and the complexities of identity. We discuss the clinical aspects of identity, the intersection of Queerness and Blackness, and the nuances of navigating societal expectations. Tune in to explore how code-switching, dating outside one's race, and maintaining connections with family shape our experiences. This episode encourages healthy dialogue around identities and aims to connect with others who share similar experiences.
SPFPP 216: Belonging Series - Is Everybody Queer?
In Episode 216 of the SPFPP Podcast, part of the Belonging Series, Patric and I, two straight Black men, delve into the complexities of queerness, Blackness, and manliness. We discuss our unique experiences navigating these intersecting identities and explore how queer spaces embrace diverse expressions of identity. This episode serves as a bat signal for those who feel they don't fit traditional molds, encouraging open dialogue and self-discovery.
SPFPP 215: Belonging Series - Identifiers
In Episode 215 of the SPFPP Podcast, part of the Belonging Series, I explore the complex intersections of my Blackness, masculinity, and queerness. This episode delves into how societal expectations challenge these identities and the journey to embrace and integrate them. I share insights on confronting internalized phobias, challenging stereotypes, and finding self-acceptance. Tune in to learn how to navigate conflicting identities and discover the core of who you truly are.
SPFPP 214: Time Doesn't Heal Wounds, It Mends Them
In Episode 214 of the SPFPP Podcast, Katie Lange from Strong Mind Counseling joins us to discuss the importance of community and mental health resources for navigating the stigma of a herpes diagnosis. Katie, a partner of SPFPP, shares insights into what people can expect from therapy and the importance of addressing trauma directly. Discover how therapy can help mend emotional wounds and foster healing, rather than simply letting time pass. Tune in to understand the bigger picture of SPFPP's mission and the impact of consistent support and discipline in overcoming stigma.
SPFPP 213: Inspiring Advocacy Through Social Support
In Episode 213 of the SPFPP Podcast, Kim, an admin for alternative social support groups, discusses her role in community building and event planning. She shares her self-care practices to prevent burnout and highlights the importance of having support networks. This episode emphasizes the vital work of behind-the-scenes volunteers who hold the community together and inspire advocacy through social support. Tune in to learn about the impact of these groups and how they contribute to reducing herpes stigma.
SPFPP 212: Raising the Standards
In this episode, Suzanne discusses how her herpes diagnosis led her to elevate her standards in relationships, embracing her self-worth while navigating the dating world. Learn how she combats stigma, advocates for sexual health, and highlights the importance of setting and maintaining high standards despite the challenges of living with herpes. This conversation underscores the critical connection between sexual health and mental health.
SPFPP 211: Delayed Disclosure & Self-Punishment
In Episode 211 of the SPFPP Podcast, Katelyn (KLongFit) opens up about her HSV1 diagnosis at 19, the impact of her religious upbringing on her sexual shame, and the challenges of delayed disclosure. After being outed by a family member, Katelyn was forced to confront her fears and disclose her status to her partner of two years. Her journey through self-reflection, journaling, and finding support in Shoshanna Raven’s Living Brave community highlights the importance of allyship and empathy. Tune in to understand the complexities of navigating herpes stigma and the power of community support.
Read her story on Elephant Journal: www.elephantjournal.com/?p=2548654.
SPFPP 210: Delayed Rejection - It’s Fine Til it isn’t
In Episode 210 of the SPFPP Podcast, Kelsy shares her experience of navigating herpes stigma and delayed rejection. After being diagnosed at 19, she became vocal about her status on social media and in her personal life. We discuss the importance of setting boundaries, managing emotional labor, and the reality of people's changing comfort levels with herpes. Kelsy highlights how empowerment and self-worth play crucial roles in handling rejections and maintaining healthy relationships. Tune in to learn how effective communication and allyship can help end stigma on an individual level.
SPFPP 209: Stigma is a Barrier to Wholeness
In Episode 209 of the SPFPP Podcast, Adrial Dale, founder of H Opportunity, shares his journey of overcoming herpes stigma and finding self-worth. Diagnosed after being cheated on, Adrial sought information to maintain a healthy sex life post-diagnosis. We discuss how stigma can hinder wholeness, the importance of support groups, and the power of embracing your entire self. Discover how courage, connection, and challenging outdated information can fuel personal growth and deeper connections. Tune in to hear Adrial's insights and experiences in navigating herpes stigma.
SPFPP 208: Therapy Exit Interviews 7 - Mental Health Resources for People with Herpes
In Episode 208 of the SPFPP Podcast, Bekka from St. Louis discusses her experience with 12 sessions of therapy, learning to disclose her herpes status, and navigating a new relationship post-diagnosis. As someone who tested positive during a period of celibacy, Bekka highlights the challenges of limited support and the benefits of mental health resources. Support our cause to connect people facing herpes stigma to therapy by donating today. Follow CourtneyBrame on Instagram. Donations via Cash App and Venmo @CourtneyBrame or PayPal at paypal.com/spfpp.
SPFPP 207: It's Not Bravery, It's Privilege
In Episode 207 of the SPFPP Podcast, I reflect on the privilege of openly discussing my herpes status and its impact on the success of Something Positive for Positive People. Joined by Emily, we explore the challenges faced by educators who must navigate stigma cautiously. This episode highlights the importance of embracing our identities, being consistent in our advocacy, and making a lasting impact despite societal barriers. Tune in to hear how I'm committed to expanding SPFPP's reach and supporting those affected by herpes stigma.
SPFPP 206: Finishing the Job - Break Through the Breakup with Erin E. Davidson
In Episode 206 of the SPFPP Podcast, Erin E. Davidson, author of "Break Through the Breakup," shares insights on managing breakups and maintaining healthy relationships. We discuss the importance of grieving not just the person, but also the memories and future envisioned. Erin emphasizes the need to maintain your support network, find closure on your terms, and differentiate between being loved and familiarity. Tune in to learn how to navigate relationship endings and embrace the healing process.
SPFPP 205: Something Positively Positive for Positive People Managing Rejection
In Episode 205 of the SPFPP Podcast, Sarah, creator of the Positively Positive Podcast, joins us to share her journey of building an authentic resource for those facing herpes stigma. We discuss the importance of empathy, resilience, and vulnerability in overcoming rejection and mental health challenges. Sarah's insights on maintaining confidence, the role of a strong support system, and the impact of sharing secrets offer valuable lessons for anyone navigating similar experiences. Tune in to discover how vulnerability can uncover confidence and foster self-acceptance.