Welcome to our Podcast
SOMETHING POSITIVE FOR POSITIVE PEOPLE
Since 2017, the SPFPP podcast has been a free resource for people navigating the emotional, relational, and social impacts of a herpes diagnosis. Through candid conversations, guests share what life looks like after testing positive—how they date, disclose, manage shame, and build relationships. You’ll hear experiences from others that reflect your own or reveal new options for moving forward.
What we talk about
Dating with Herpes
From casual sex to long-term commitment, guests share how they communicate their status and build relationships that work for them.Stigma & Identity
How people reclaim their sense of self after diagnosis and rebuild confidence on their own terms.Sexual Health
Tools for navigating safer sex, honest communication, and deeper relational alignment.Alternative Relationship Styles
Non-monogamy, queerness, and connecting beyond traditional relationship norms.Emotional Healing
Stories of grief, growth, and self-acceptance. Often, herpes is the distraction—not the root. These episodes explore the deeper patterns that diagnosis reveals.
If you’re ready to share your experience (anonymously or publicly), please fill out the podcast guest intake form below, and we’ll reach out to interview you!
Looking for something in particular?
Search below for anything you’re curious about, and don’t hesitate to contact us if you can’t find what you’re looking for.
I began consuming your podcast like it was water after walking through the desert for days. I was practically catatonic from the blow of my diagnosis, and I didn't know where to turn. I was in those initial stages of grief—somewhere between shock, denial, and anger. I won't say I was suicidal, but I did have the thought that if I died, it wouldn't really matter because my life was practically over anyway. Some months later, I learned about your SPFPP Herpes Stigma Conference in May 2024 and registered for it. I can now say I've survived one of the most difficult periods of my life—and now I'm thriving.
—J.
SPFPP 379: Dating with Herpes - Should you Only Date People with the Same Type?
“Should I only date someone with the same type of herpes?” It’s a common question—often rooted in fear, protection, and the desire for connection. In this episode, Jhivan shares what it’s been like navigating dating, sex, and stigma just three months after their diagnosis. They speak openly about identity, sexual confidence, cultural attitudes, and the decision to withhold intimacy until better understanding their body. If you’re navigating herpes and wondering how to feel like yourself again—especially in dating—this conversation is for you.
SPFPP 351: pleasure positivity - harm reduction at the intersection of safety and pleasure
In this episode of SPFPP, Mel Moseley opens up about her journey with HSV2 and how it led her to redefine sex positivity. We explore how the conversation around sex positivity often misses the mark by focusing too much on intercourse and not enough on communication and emotional safety. Mel shares how polyamory and intentional communication helped her heal from past trauma and find true connection.
SPFPP 349: Nonmonogamous conversations monogamous people need to have - Part 1
Join us as we explore the hard conversations monogamous people need to have—often taken for granted in non-monogamous relationships. From the fear of disclosure to the impact of stigma on our self-esteem, this episode is all about asking the tough questions and improving communication in our relationships.
SPFPP 341: Nurture your nature
In this heartwarming episode of SPFPP, Lindsey revisits her journey from disclosing her herpes status to finding lasting love and marriage. Explore valuable lessons on relationship dynamics, stepping into new family roles, and the joys of pregnancy despite the challenges of living with herpes. Join us for an enlightening conversation that promises to inspire and inform.
SPFPP 325: Discordant dating with herpes
In "Discordant Dating with Herpes," Episode 325 of Something Positive for Positive People, delve into the nuances of relationships where one partner is HSV positive. The episode highlights a 2021 survey finding that 62% of HSV-positive individuals have non-positive partners willing to engage sexually post-disclosure. Explore essential questions and considerations for navigating such relationships, aiming to foster openness and informed decision-making in the realm of dating with herpes. Join us as we break down stigma and enhance dialogue around discordant dating.
SPFPP 299: How Do I Disclose My Herpes Status
In this insightful episode of SPFPP, Dr. Evelin Dacker explores the S.T.A.R.S. framework, offering a strategic approach to herpes disclosure and dating.
SPFPP 292: Rejection is the Risk for the Reward of Connection
In a compelling session of Something Positive for Positive People, our guest recounts a deeply personal tale of deception and growth following her herpes diagnosis. From receiving hush money to navigating the complexities of trust and intimacy, she shares how these experiences have shaped her views on relationships and personal development. The episode beautifully blends spiritual wisdom with practical life lessons, urging listeners to reflect on the quality of their connections and the profound impact of living authentically.
SPFPP 290: Playful Disclosures
Join Savannah and Courtney in Episode 290 of Something Positive for Positive People as they engage in a playful mock disclosure using the STARS Talk method. Discover how embracing aspects of identity post-diagnosis can enhance communication and confidence in discussing herpes with potential partners.
Spfpp 258: OHA Series - WORK WITH US
In Episode 258 of the OHA Series on Something Positive for Positive People, Elle (she/her), a 27-year-old sex-positive Oregonian, shares her journey with a recent HSV-1 genital diagnosis. Surprisingly open about her experience, Elle highlights how self-education and learning from others' discussions about HSV have been invaluable. The conversation emphasizes the gap between health organizations and grassroots educators, stressing the importance of collaboration to enhance sexual health education and reduce STI transmissions. Join us to explore why working together is key to better sexual health outcomes.
SPFPP 219: When it Gets Real
In Episode 219 of the SPFPP Podcast, Jennifer and I delve into the intersections of identities as BIPOC individuals dating outside our race. We discuss our experiences with fetishization and the questions Jennifer, of Asian descent, frequently encounters about her dating history with different races. We explore the intention behind these questions, whether rooted in safety or fetishization.
Jennifer shares her approach to handling ignorance, deciding who is worth the emotional labor to educate. We also revisit the topic of herpes disclosure, particularly the challenges of communicating about outbreaks after an initial disclosure. Jennifer's story highlights the importance of creating allies by dissolving stigma within ourselves and expressing our beliefs and feelings about living with herpes.
This episode sheds light on the nuanced dynamics of interracial dating, the ongoing conversations required for herpes disclosures, and the power of allyship in our community. Tune in to gain insights into these important topics and learn how to navigate them with empathy and understanding.
SPFPP 210: Delayed Rejection - It’s Fine Til it isn’t
In Episode 210 of the SPFPP Podcast, Kelsy shares her experience of navigating herpes stigma and delayed rejection. After being diagnosed at 19, she became vocal about her status on social media and in her personal life. We discuss the importance of setting boundaries, managing emotional labor, and the reality of people's changing comfort levels with herpes. Kelsy highlights how empowerment and self-worth play crucial roles in handling rejections and maintaining healthy relationships. Tune in to learn how effective communication and allyship can help end stigma on an individual level.
SPFPP Episode 157: The Number 1 Dating Site for People with HSV
Do dating sites exclusively designed for people living with herpes do more harm than good? How we use these resources determines their value. Sites that don't encourage transparency still perpetuate stigma. After a poll, Instagram emerged as the top dating site for people with HSV, showcasing how any platform can be transformed into a supportive space for dating.
Episode 107: Dating Advice from a Divorced Marriage Therapist
Exploring the concept of outsourcing your needs to multiple relationships, this episode features a conversation with a divorced marriage therapist. We discuss the importance of recognizing various types of connections and how fulfilling different needs through multiple relationships can lead to a more balanced and satisfying life.